Listen, Americans, and I shall tell ya
of the hero who stopped a maga rebellion
On the sixth of January, 2021:
He swung a. gavel, not a gun.
Many a citizen, still alive
still remembers that deep dive
into treasonous mad rebellion
by a herd of magamaniac hellions.
But there was one brave man who stopped the show,
While rioters shouted go, go go!
VP Mike said NO NO NO.
That’s not the way it’s done.
No, not by the power of the gun
Nor by the force of insurrection.
We will not go in that direction!
The Joker had drummed up their maga ire;
it burned hot like confederate fire:
a zombie contrivance of the old rebel yell
a twisted revival for slavery’s hell!
As the war drums pounded in Congressional halls
Traitors sent out their insurrection calls.
Gallows for VP Pence were erected outside
while the joker stoked madness in the maddening tide
as if Mike’s honor depended on the joker’s plot
while insurrectionists drummed up a fury so hot!
But when Security led our Congress to safe places
those traitorous gamblers lost all their aces.
So they danced around for awhile liked they owned the place
but really they were drumming up a great disgrace.
But Mike Pence knew
as the American people did too
’t’was the witch of Endor, a maga staffer
say’in’ the trump shall be prez hereafter!
But Mike Pence knew
as the American people did too
that their votes, being counted
would show the insurrectionists routed,
far, far away to the hovels of maga-land
where their rocky rebellion would sink in the sand.
And so, while Mike was escorted to a safe place
far below the riot, away from the maga rats’ race,
His aides sought counsel in desperate prayer
as Mike’s family huddled in the hovel downstairs,
Advisors Marc and Greg sought wisdom in Scriptures
as, floors above, insurrectionists ripped their riptures
slashing here and destroying there
having for our Congress not a care
holding no respect for Constitution,
nor reverence for our lawful institutions.
But after many hours of terror and destruction
Our Metro and Capitol Police ended that obstruction.
In the wee hours of Jan7 morning
after the riotous Jan6 storming,
Congress re-convened to count Electoral votes,
thus restoring our American electoral hopes.
They counted the Electoral votes;
thus defeating the insurrectionist dopes.
On the 7th of January, 1921
Mike swung his gavel, not a gun.
Many a citizen, still alive
still remembers that deep dive
into treasonous mad rebellion
by a herd of magamaniac hellions.
But Mike saved the day
by upending the fray
swinging his gavel in Lawful duty
while magas clung to their trumpian booty.
But for their booty I wouldn’t give you a dime
‘cuz our Constitution prevails, time after time.
And I told them that!
said Amos to Andy as they sat.
Listen, Americans, and you shall hear
how Mike Pence saved our Republic, so dear!
Go to Dome, directly to the dome.
Do not pass go; do not collect dollars
Go complain to your Daily Callers!
We like calling America home,
while magas wail and insurrectionists roam.
Go on! skeedaddle!
We don’t want your magamania battle!
